One of my son’s best friends is currently organizing a sweet 16 party. A party I might add that will probably exceed the cost and extravagance of the biggest wedding I’ve ever attended. She was offered a week cruise with 3 of her best friends, but opted for the party instead, mainly because my son is the wrong sex to be included in the all expense paid cruise.

It’s not until next March, but this is what he’s saving his money to buy.

A royal blue zoot suit!

It continues!

It’s blatantly obvious the system isn’t working - how many copies of my green card does Richmond County need to get a clue? I’m dealing with a bunch of incompetent bozos with an archaic record keeping system.

Why is it my responsibility to remind them EVERY FRIGGIN YEAR (sometimes twice) that I am not a citizen, and I’m not able to sit on a jury - your rules, not mine. I would gladly sit on a jury if it would stop the annoying threatening ‘you can be fined $1000′ letters.

So again I have to mail them the stupid letter and send ANOTHER copy of my green card and make a trip to the post office (which you all know I despise) to buy a stamp to put on the damn letter and mail it to ‘I don’t have a clue’ Stephen J. Fiala.

JHC they can’t even provide a fax number to make an annoying situation easier for me.

Yes I know I dislike big gas guzzling vehicles, but I almost crashed my car this morning drooling over the Mercedes R350

It’s positively beautiful looking

0 to 60 in 8 seconds  - I’m in love.

Last night I lit a cigarette - C called 911 to report a fire.

Sigh, I have to hide the phones now? And quite smoking - again.

After moaning for close to a year about my 8yr old pc blue screening and failing to do what I asked, I finally bought a new pc (a mother’s day gift I might add)

I trudged to best buy first, as you know I have that I WANT IT NOW! mentality. They had a very cool system on sale - Dell w/ intel quad core processor, 4 meg ram, 700gig hdd - 5 times faster than the one I have now.

Of course, it’s me, and nothing ever goes as planned.

It wasn’t installed with ms office, but ms works - I HATE ms works

It also came with a free 19in monitor and canon printer which I don’t need. So I made the guy a reasonable offer - keep the printer and monitor and give me a copy of ms word.

No can do says guy. But I don’t need monitor and printer says I. But it comes with it, says he, if we just sold the unit we’d have a warehouse filled with monitors. Then maybe it would be a good idea to mention this to your manager and not order so many monitors in future says I.

Moving along to the OS as I got no joy with ms word. All pc’s came with vista and you all know I hate vista and no I’m not willing to give it a try - I have enough stress in my life thank you very much.

The sales assistant was very nice, not a problem says he we can install XP pro for you - WOW COOL, that was easy.

then

It’ll be another $355

I giggled, which came out as a snort and made my way to the exit.

So I came home and browsed Dell

Ordered a really cool system, with winxp. BUT I bought the friggin thing with the wrong processor.

So I had to call to make changes, because God forbid Dell gives you 24 hours on the website to alter the shit you screw up, that would be to friggin easy wouldn’t it?!

And so began talking with a rep whose first tongue was not English. Oh Joy!

I explained to him what I’d done, and could he alter the processor for me.

OMG no he couldn’t he’d have to cancel the entire order and start again.

Whatever.

So he did, and so began a painful 45 minutes on the phone trying to duplicate my order except for the processor.

After he’d finished he started reading my list back to me, unfortunately, he’d clicked on the wrong graphics card.

He went back and changed the graphics card

then he started reading the list again - from the beginning and lo and behold he’d clicked on vista.

He went back and changed it to XP

Then he started reading the list again, f_r_o_m t_h_e b_e_g_i_n_n_i_n_g, and this time he gave me Mc Afee anti virus - I specifically asked for none

He went back and removed it and started reading the friggin list again

Then he had to go back in and remove MS works - I have office 2003 so asked for no productivity software

AND HE STARTED READING THE LIST AGAIN!!!!

I couldn’t, I just couldn’t listen to the list one more time - at this point I didn’t care if there was a $50,000 car tagged onto the end of it, I WANTED IT OVER!

“DUDE! STOP! you say the words ‘ 500gb ncq sata hard drive running at 7200 rpm w 16MB databurst cache’ one more friggin time and I’m hanging up the phone. Give my purchase id, order number, reference number, and any other number you need to give me and submit the damn order already. ”

AN HOUR of my time I will never get back. Shoot me now.

Why is it flying bugs managed to find their way into my gazebo with ease yet die of exhaustion trying to find their way out?